Survivor Resources

you are
not alone

Whatever you’re going through, you deserve to be
safe, supported, and believed.

If you’re in a situation that feels off, scary, or too hard to explain—this page is for you.

Maybe you’re thinking about leaving. Maybe you’re not sure if what’s happening is even bad enough. Either way, you deserve to feel safe, supported, and believed.

I’ve been there. I know how isolating it can feel. You don’t have to go through it alone, and it’s not too late to start figuring things out. Below are some resources where you can talk to someone, make a plan, or just take the next small step.

📱Immediate crisis help

National Domestic Violence Hotline
📞 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
📱 Text “START” to 88788
💻 thehotline.org (24/7 chat available)

Offers confidential support, safety planning, and local referrals. You don’t have to give your name. You don’t have to report anything. Just talk.

🌍 Find Local Support (U.S.)

🔒 6 Signs of Stockholm Syndrome

(The Kind You Don’t Always Realize Are Happening)

  • You defend them—even when you’re the one who’s hurt.

    You find yourself making excuses for them: “They’re just stressed,” “It wasn’t that bad,” “They’re not always like this.” You protect them from consequences, even as they hurt you.

  • You feel guilty for being upset.

    Instead of getting angry at what they did, you feel bad for reacting. You start thinking you’re the problem for being hurt, scared, or overwhelmed.

  • You see tiny moments of kindness as proof they care.

    A good day, an apology, or a small act of affection feels huge. You cling to it—because it’s so rare—and it makes you question whether things are really “that bad.”

  • You’re scared to tell the truth about them.

    Even if part of you knows what they’re doing is wrong, you worry about what might happen if you speak up—how they’ll react, what others will think, or whether anyone will believe you.

  • You feel safer staying than leaving.

    The idea of walking away feels impossible—even dangerous. You've been convinced that this is as good as it's going to get, or that things will get worse if you go.

  • You lose track of who you were before them.

    Your confidence, independence, even your likes and dislikes start to fade. You’re constantly adjusting to keep the peace, and you barely recognize yourself anymore.

She doesn’t need judgment. She needs a way out.

What People Get Wrong About Domestic Violence

  • Leaving is often the most dangerous time for a victim. Abusers use control, threats, finances, fear, and isolation to make leaving feel impossible. On average, it takes seven attempts before someone leaves for good—and that’s if they survive it.

  • Abuse isn’t just physical. It can be emotional, verbal, sexual, financial, psychological—or all of the above. Just because there aren’t bruises doesn’t mean someone isn’t being destroyed from the inside out.

  • Many victims do tell someone—and they’re not believed. Or they’re blamed. Or they’re told to pray about it, keep it quiet, or stay for the kids. Silence isn’t weakness—it’s often a survival skill.

  • The damage doesn’t end when the relationship does. Survivors often deal with PTSD, legal retaliation, custody battles, trauma triggers, and the slow, hard work of learning to trust again—even themselves.

  • No. Abuse doesn’t care how smart, successful, educated, or “strong” you are. It happens to women with PhDs. It happens to moms, CEOs, teenagers, therapists, and teachers. Abuse isn’t about weakness—it’s about someone else’s need for power and control. And it can happen to anyone.